Robrt L. Pela

What makes a man?

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Still trying to figure out what to do with all those gift cards you received as holiday gifts? You might spend one on a copy of The Dictionary of Men, a new book that attempts to define the male species based on where he was born, where he attended college and what he does for a living.

No, really. Authors Maria Blanco and Jane Black have chosen 365 different types of man—one for every day of the year—and by identifying his favorite car and what kind of shoes he wears, have deconstructed the male mystique with short, alphabetized, tongue-in-cheek definitions of every imaginable kind of guy. As defined here, the men are at the mercy of their favorite cocktail, whether they shave every day, and how much hair they have on the backs of their hands.

A second section, titled True Romantic and Unfortunate Encounters (TRUE), offers illustrated, real-life dating habits of different types of men. Culled from what had to have been thrilling research, this section hints at what one might expect to experience over dinner with “High-Maintenance Hayden,” “Marco the Mama’s Boy,” and “Dave the Douchebag.” 

Available only at dictionaryofmen.com, the book will evidently do away with the need for psychotherapy caused by failed romances. “All women have acute intuition, but they just don’t use it,” Blanco says. “Seeing other women’s trials and tribulations in print is the cheapest and most valuable therapy session.”

Published by MASH Media, a women-owned publishing and multimedia firm, the dictionary is purse-sized and full of comic barbs made at the expense of the “stronger sex.” Men will, according to co-author Black, love the book as much as women, apparently because they are as clueless about what drives their male friends as are women. “For men, it’s like picking up a personalized version of GQ, Maxim or Playboy,” she says, “where all their buddies and bunnies can be found.”

Not to mention a whole lot of funny put-downs and stereotypical categorizations, which is possibly just what men deserve, after centuries of asking their female counterparts to endure the same.  

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